July 6, 2024, at exactly 7:00 PM, I had my first experience with P. cubensis (strain TAT), popularly known as magic mushrooms. In summary, the experience was a whirlwind of emotions; I went from wanting to be swallowed by the world to wanting to dominate it. I experienced depersonalization several times. After about 2 hours, I didn’t care much about writing down my impressions, so some things are lost and I’ll keep them to myself.

I ingested 3 grams and recorded my experiences in my notebook during the trip. The time 00:00 (hours:minutes) corresponds to the first moment of ingestion.

My playlist during the trip was this one, but I also listened to Musick to Play in the Dark (Coil) a few times.

I should add that I’m not a spiritual individual, so I didn’t feel anything divine like so many people report. For me, this was a very psychological experience. The first hour of the trip had a more “trippy” tone, then it took a darker tone. But it was not a “bad trip”, it was just a somber one.

• 00:00: Ingestion of 3 grams of P. cubensis after about 6 hours of fasting.
• 00:07: Nothing. I even managed to do some work. Now I’m going to relax a bit and listen to music.
• 00:13: Slightly funny feeling in my head, as if someone was lightly touching it at times.
• 00:17: Warmth in my head.
• 00:20: Feeling a bit heavy and tired, slightly nauseous.
• 00:23: Thinking about “S”.
• 00:25: Starting to feel things. Seeing some visual artifacts. Head is hot again and somewhat heavy. Long Season by Fishmans is beautiful.
• 00:30: More minor visual stimuli. Change in mood, laughter. Some slight color changes.
• 00:35: Time seems to pass more slowly. The textures of the wooden furniture seem to dance. I see movement where there is none. The textures of things seem more intense, and I’m starting to have a bit of trouble writing.
• 00:38: The peripheries of my vision are especially stimulated, and the hair on my body is irritating.
• 00:42: Difficulty moving around. The headboard of the bed looks like a living being. I’m starting to notice patterns in the wood.
• 00:44: Even flat and straight things seem cozy.
• 00:50: Thinking in English with some kind of weird accent. Long Season still playing. Feeling drunk but not really. Voice funny sometimes.
• 00:52: Feeling lonely, missing the company of a special someone.
• 00:55: Swans. Kitchen floor looks bloody.
• 01:04: Time really passes slowly. I almost couldn’t interpret the digital clock. Gothic and somber feeling.
• 01:07: Strange sensations and movements in my mouth.
• 01:11: Feeling sensual and wanting to love someone, slowly and passionately.
• 01:15: The name, body without organs (…)
• 01:24: Ate gummy candies in the most ritualistic way possible, as if it were a form of cannibalism.
• 01:33: The most important drop of tea in the world.
• 01:39: You are Pedro. Don’t forget you are Pedro.
• 01:47: What did I do wrong to you? Physical processes keep me grounded in reality.
• 01:53: Toussaint L’ouverture.
• 02:04: Thinking about “S”. Aguirre, Der Zorn Gottes.
• 02:30: Simulated conversations with “S” in which I was not myself, I was not Pedro from São Paulo, I was Pedro from Porto Alegre, cold, but who never lived in Porto Alegre. Pedro looks at himself in the mirror. Pedro kisses the microphone and almost commits The Great Death.
• 04:31: Still somewhat “zoned out” and with slight feelings of depersonalization, but I consider the strongest part over. It doesn’t even feel like almost 5 hours have passed. sudo poweroff